hello kitty friends

[09 25 03 · 11:23pm] hey, just wanted to say I have a greatestjournal, and if you wanna add me, you can. the same username here is like the one there; vocal_melody so you can check it out  here kiss

short entry [09 25 03 · 08:56pm] mood · calm music · The tv k, well, obviously, I haven't updated in a while. I don't have much to say. I guess I'm getting detached from all this aol crap. Things at school are well and with friends. It's so funny that the last question was "Will James and me last?" and then I broke up with him that sunday. Sorry, Tracy. I guess what you say doesn't always go. ;[ But it's alright; we're still friends. Muahz. kiss

random thought... [09 10 03 · 06:45pm] The Trix rabbit is the dumbest fucking thing of life. I'm glad he doesn't get cereal already. Everytime he gets it...He fucks up and gets wild in front of people. Go to the bathroom or something, but no he fucks it up and is annoying. Shit I'd take the cereal from him too kiss

Been a long time [09 09 03 · 10:14pm] mood · silly music · "Pretty Baby"- Vanessa Carlton Journal- Doesn't my journal look awesome? Credits 2: Sky. Thanks, girl. You're the best. School- It's been great, actually. Usually it's so depressing to me that I don't wanna go, but I like it. For some reason, something's changed, and I feel like I've changed. My classes aren't any easier. They're actually pretty hard. Chemistry, I was surprised I understood today. Algebra 2, I got 2 D's already and it was basic Algebra. I gotta be more attentive, I guess. I mean, I get it. Probably making stupid mistakes. Friends- Welp, they're good I guess. It's just, nothing real special has happened with any friends. I mean, it's been good but nothing worth talking about, really. I got Dunia for choir and for Algebra 2. Yay, math with Dunia. Has got to be fun. Well, everyone was like "Oh no. It's Dunia and Gisselle again" yup..we're the bitches in the back, front, or middle of the class...any where, we will be the bitches haha. I met a girl name Morgan and she's really niice. And then James introduced me to Sky and Ria. Awesome girls. Love- On the subject of James, it brings me to my next topic. Of course, James. He's so adorable. For a while, he started acting...well, different. He'd be snapping at me for no reason. I'd sit here and understand, but then instead of making him understand what I fell, I'd take it. I finally let him know. I couldn't go much longer with that. But he's trying to control it, and we've been fine now. Think we'll last? ·.2.·  ·· kiss

Letter to James: [09 07 03 · 01:53am] mood · rejuvenated I hope you're having sweet dreams, babe. I couldn't wait till morning to tell you this 'cause we all know gisselle's a lil impatient. I wanted to say that I think you're truly a blessing to have as a boyfriend. I have not been happy in a long time, and for over a year I've been trying to find what it was that was just slicing me up. I needed someone to talk to, and I think I found what it was. I guess that whole God and father situation bugged me forever. When you were signing off I was breaking down and tears were coming down. It was a touchy subject. When I dried them off, I felt tingles and goosebumps everywhere and it kind of scared me and then it stopped and like..all my knots went away..my back was always hurting. all the tension left my body and my mind cleared. I felt renewed. I trust you in keeping that info to yourself, and thanks so much, baby for everything. I love you. kiss

Quicky [08 31 03 · 04:30am] mood · sleepy Wow, well... I haven't written much. Making a quick journal entry. Everything's going great with James and me. I'm back in school and I'm a junior! It's great. I'm already sick, though which was the only down part. But I'm working on getting rid of it. Hopefully, this year I can chill somewhere besides school with Dunia. My classes are slack, and they're great. I think it's gonna be a good year. I got the new Lord Of The Rings- Two Towers dvd and the Hilary Duff cd. I also got the cutiest Hello Kitty bag for my school books which goes to the side like all my school bags. Hello Kitty = my upcoming thing for blurty. Muahz. Night ·.1.·  ·· kiss

Word of the day: tweaked [08 11 03 · 06:35pm] mood · creative These past days; Hey, there. I actually came online early today. Mainly, it was because my sister asked me to come on to look up where exactly to get my permit so that I can finally drive. I haven't updated in a while, I know. There are many things to tell. I'll break it down. Well, last week all week I have been going out with my mom and such. Mainly, it was to get a dress for Lely's quincenera (15th) birthday party. It took three malls to find one but I got a very pretty one. I also cut my hair about shoulder length. It's only just a teeeeny tiny bit longer. Plus, I put copper highlights in my hair. I am hott? Maybe. ;p That special one; The last time I updated was a long time ago, and my thoughts and feelings had been disorganized for a while. I believe I found what I want. I already told you I have been wanting to be with James again. Well, I hadn't been having a good day when I went out shopping and all that day, so I wasn't very happy at all. I was talking to James that night when I got home and he was making me feel better as usual, by just talking to me, and we were getting a long. So on that night, on the 4th, we got together. I was happy then, obviously lol. He's changed so much, and into the guy I sort of always knew he could be. I had forgotten for so long and begun to get over him as to loving him. Then he reminds me. I love the fact that I'm with him. I feel like we could start all over again and it's going to great. He's not the asshole I was in love with, he's now the sweetest guy I'm getting to love more and more each day. ·.1.·  ·· kiss

[08 02 03 · 09:01pm] mood · good music · "Prince" - Vanessa Carlton So far- Sitting here, as usal, and talking to James. Last night I got three new cds. Mya - "Moodring'," Vanessa Carlton, and Michelle Branch's "Hotel Paper." They're good. I like them. Good cds to listen to and should keep me busy for a while. The last ones have been boring me like..ehh. Well, Rell has not been online because she needs a modem, and Caitlin's going out. Starting tomorrow, I'm gonna start to go out for at least a week. Lely's birthday is on Friday. Party on Saturday. On Wednesday I'm getting a hair cut. I'm cutting it up to around my shoulders, a little past. Also, I'm getting highlights for the first time, probably in like...a bronze color. I think it'll look cute. If James gets a ride to come to Miami on Thursday, he so better come. I want to meet him. I mean, of course I'm nervous. What if he doesn't like me? What if he's some hairy guy? kidding..rofl. Which leads to the next subject... Ooh, Ooh, Baby- Well, as for my love life, I know I said that I didn't want a boyfriend. Well, I don't mind having one. It's just that I don't need one for me to live. I've been talking to James for a while again, and those feelings as usual came back. We all know I wasn't over him, and I wanted to talk to him so I tried to get rid of my feelings for him, so I ignored them. I even told him I didn't want a boyfriend. It was kind of a mistake because I do want to be with him, and I do still like him. I know that I'm not the little girl I used to be. I know I have a lot to learn, but I've learned a lot in all that I've gone through with him. Maybe we just weren't ready then, but sometimes things happen. For example, you don't know how much someone means to you until you let them go, and you just want them back. Sometimes it can't happen, sometimes there's still hope left. Maybe we just had to learn where we're at, to be who we are, and then make it. I don't know. I've just never had faith in me and a guy like I have with him. Usually, it's easier than this to let someone go, especially after you haven't talked in such a long time. He says he likes me too, and he says he means it. Then there are the people who hate the idea of the probability that we'll get back together. Most people says "Alright, you do what you want" and leave it alone. You just don't bitch people out for following their hearts. That's just bullshit. And to all those ho's that be doing that, you can suck on my non-existant nuts like you probably do with all them other guys you be seein'. Sorry, ghetto came out of me. -cough- anyway... I don't really care what people say. True friends let you do what makes you happy, and in my heart, James is what's making me happy. They respect that. Sometimes, you gotta get your friends in check. So that's about it. Hope you had fun reading. ·.2.·  ·· kiss

[07 26 03 · 01:20am] mood · blah music · "Queer" - Garbage Lately- Well, what can I say? It's been boring. I haven't done anything new or exciting. I was supposed to call my sister today and Dunia, but my grandmother was using the phone when I was ready to call, so I forgot. I tend to be forgetful. I should really do something this week. I need to get my ass out of this house. My grandma's sick and it's like... germ infestation for totally. It's all good. That means I'm probably not doing anything. I sooo want to see the Mandy Moore movie. It ticks me off that I can't see it. Oh, I also wanted to spend my bday money on something like cute shirts and stuff so when I actually do go out. Dunia's got summer night school though, so does Lely. So see? This sucks. I'm stuck at home talking to James now... joy ;X! My Love Is Like Wo'- I've noticed a lot of these entries tend to deal with a lot of different guys. Wow, makes me seem great, hm? lol. Yeah, I'm still single. I've noticed that a lot of guys I talked about, something bad tends to happen so nothing actually... happens between us. It's like I have this jinx on me. So, like I said, I've decided to take it slow and see if I've found someone I really want to be with. I mean, lately I've been in dumb little funny relationships/scams. I think I want something real, but yet be able to live my life. I don't know... I think I'm scared love will change me lol. I mean, some relationships I thought were serious just seem to mean very little to me. I didn't know anything about them. I was a little girl. I guess now I've matured a bit more, ya know? There's this guy, though, and I think that what had seemed to be a little school girl love thing has turned into the real thing. I mean, I tried to avoid it, but it just builded up instead. I know I've got a lot to learn. I guess I just want someone who would understand me. ·.3.·  ·· kiss

Live It Down [07 23 03 · 07:44pm] mood · accomplished hoIe: SOMEONE has to still have them Iight phoenix: WILL YOU FUCKING STOP Iight phoenix: GOD DAMN Iight phoenix: IT'S ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT IN THE FIRST PLACE Iight phoenix: NEVER GONNA FUCKING LET ME LIVE IT DOWN Iight phoenix: THAT WANS'T LIKE ME TO DO SHIT LIKE THAT Iight phoenix: GROW A FUCKING DICK JASON hoIe: .. whoa hoIe: calm down, rosa parks. Iight phoenix: Calm down? hoIe: yahh hoIe: jeeeeeesus Iight phoenix: Yeah, send me a pic of your 1 inch dick so that I can send it out to everyone Iight phoenix: SEE HOW YOU FUCKING LIKE IT ASSHOLE Iight phoenix: AT LEAST I HAVE SOMETHING TO SHOW kiss

Ghetto Baby Shower [07 21 03 · 04:24am] mood · tired Wow mk. Almost morning. I'm sitting here at the computer like a geek, as usual, watching Jeff Corwin. Lol... He's hott. Today was pretty much crazy. I woke up and got ready to go to a baby shower. I went over to Lizette's house for it. That is what you call a ghetto baby shower. I feel bad, though, because her house is actually ghetto. She has a hard time there and I know for a fact she doesn't like being there. I wouldn't either. That's a house of nuts, on top of that. A little retardation going on. Thats not even as a joke, it's serious. You cannot stand being sober there. So many little kids running around on top of that. I got drunk as hell. Anyway, by the time the "party" was over, I came home. Tired as hell, might I add. I was drunk still, tryna sober up. I had to lay down. After that, I attended to the computer and after taking a cold shower, I snapped out of it. No hangover. Thank God. Just take aprin/tylenol/ whatever.. and drink a lot of whatever. Prevents hangovers for totally. lol.. Anyway, that was the end of my day. kiss

[07 18 03 · 03:13am] mood · hot music · "More To Life" - Stacie Orrico Usual Life- Well, so what's to talk about? Every day, I come online, and I'm bored. Nothing to do, I sing, I deal with bullshit online, and I stay up at night with Ally either making fun of people are just chillin'. It's getting boring. [ No offense Ally ilu, but you know you're bored too. ] When I go out, I chill with my sister, drink, and watch movies. Joy. I want something more. My life reminds me of Stacie Orrico's "More To Life" song, because there's gotta be more...than wanting more. ;X Movies- Tomorrow, July 18th! YESYESYES! MANDYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MOOOOOREEEEE. k done. How To Deal comes out. You should all go watch it, especially me. I so want to. Oh, and I saw Pirates of the Caribbean. Great movie. Johnny Depp = amazing actor. Orlando Bloom = amazing orgasm. - giggle. - Say what? - I was recently asked to do some task to ruin RCWF even though there was actually no plan at all. I felt kind of bad. I was violating a "bitch squad" code. I thought I was helping Kerry out because he messed her up, but that wasn't true. Basically, we treat others how we're treated. Well, for the good side about it was that I met Tad, right? And I was supposed to fxck him over, but he turned out to be a real nice guy. He's real cute, too lol. He likes me. ;o He's sweet. He called me today from his cell and we talked for quite a while. Everyone thinks we're together or something. Well, I do like him... but I don't know if I like him enough to be with him. I figure I just should stay single for a while. MeMeMe- I need to think about myself, as conceited as that sounds, and found out what I want out of life right now. Take my own paths. Find who I really am, and do things on my own. I'm still changing slowly and becoming who I really am. I mean, I'm 16 so I'm old enough to experience more of life, and I'm young enough to enjoy it and find what I want. So with that, I continue on my journey, as I download Rooney ;D <3 Cait. kiss

Journal worthy [07 10 03 · 10:45pm] mood · silly Losing Sunday: Who is Mike? <.< Iight phoenix: Ant's best friend Losing Sunday: ;x Ah Gay lovers Losing Sunday: ;x Iight phoenix: ... Iight phoenix: ;x Iight phoenix: Well, they've been suspected of it Losing Sunday: XD kiss

I should've seen it before [07 08 03 · 10:22pm] mood · annoyed ISimpIy Poetic: THEY WANT YOU TO BE SOMEONE YOU CAN'T. Iight phoenix: WHAT DO THEY WANT ME TO BE THEN? ISimpIy Poetic: THEY SAY THE SHIT THEY DO TO UPSET YOU AND MAKE YOU FEEL BAD AND BEND SO THEY FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE ISimpIy Poetic: IT DOESN'T MATTER Iight phoenix: TELL ME WHAT MOST OF THEM WANT ME TO BE THAT I'M NOT Iight phoenix: I NEED AN EXAMPLE ISimpIy Poetic: A whore ISimpIy Poetic: They want you to fuck everyone on AOL ISimpIy Poetic: and be proud about it Iight phoenix: They take text seriously ISimpIy Poetic: Which is why all sex related jokes are aimed at you Iight phoenix: Yeah kiss

Interesting Convo [07 08 03 · 05:13pm] mood · amused Iight phoenix: Ali..question..do you umm..hate me? Iight phoenix: ;x AIi dork: .. hate is such a strong word. AIi dork: x.x Iight phoenix: you dislike me Iight phoenix: -.- Iight phoenix: very much Iight phoenix: DEEPLY Iight phoenix: lmao AIi dork: lmao. AIi dork: Okay.. honestly, it's like.. I like you when you're cool and chilled out, but you do some stupid stuff that just makes me feel ashamed to even know you. Iight phoenix: Oh...Ali Iight phoenix: That's why I say you're hypocritical Iight phoenix: 'cause.. Iight phoenix: you do it too. I'm just not rude about it. Iight phoenix: Until you are. :] AIi dork: .. what exactly have I done, too? Iight phoenix: and the stupid things I do..I basically say it on purpose. Some I'm just slow...and Iight phoenix: ..Like you haven't acted stupid, Ali. AIi dork: .. I'm not talking about acting stupid. Iight phoenix: I haven't gone beyond your stupidity Iight phoenix: And people laugh when I do things. Iight phoenix: Because it was dumb Iight phoenix: Well, Ali. A lot of the things you say can be stupid. AIi dork: and I've chilled out a lot within the past year.. Iight phoenix: Ok, and let me be myself. Iight phoenix: Don't be rude. Iight phoenix: I don't mind the fact that you're saying..ok, chill out Iight phoenix: but you're rude about Iight phoenix: THAT'S what ticks me off Iight phoenix: because I am nice. AIi dork: But back to what I had said before, it wasn't acting stupid Iight phoenix: But you can only push me so far. Then suddenly I'm a bitch. AIi dork: It was putting your dignity up for crumpling when you stooped to sending nude pictures to Jay and Ant of all people AIi dork: And running around acting drunk like its a cool thing, and completely denying that its anything bad. Iight phoenix: I didn't send shit to Ant Iight phoenix: It was Jay and Mike. Mike because I really like him and Jay basically threatened me. Which by the way, now I see didn't matter. AIi dork: .. well, whatever. Iight phoenix: I didn't run around acting like I was a drunk. Mike got me upset. He broke my heart. I felt numb. I took my shot of liquid coc. Iight phoenix: I told you I wasn't drunk Iight phoenix: If and when I'm drunk, I don't get online like some idiots do because then I get dizzy and nautious Iight phoenix: but when I'm just a little buzzed, I don't care what people think about me anymore AIi dork: whatever, giss. Iight phoenix: You know, it's so typical for people wanting me to be perfect Iight phoenix: And I'm sorry that I make mistakes. Iight phoenix: No, I'm not perfect. I don't know why people expect it in the first place. Iight phoenix: I'm just human too. I do things that are stupid, I've made a lot of mistakes. Iight phoenix: Quit judging others before you get to know them. And even then, don't judge them, but we all judge everyone, so see? You make mistakes too. AIi dork: .. I'm not judging you at all, I just haven't felt like your friend since way back in Brandon day. You're fun to talk to sometimes, but you're not my friend. Leave it at that. Iight phoenix: Alright. Let's. But be mature about it, then I will too. AIi dork: .. What started this, anyways? Iight phoenix: I don't know, but you know when you can tell someone just doesn't like you? You figure it out when you're rude, yet other times pass it off giving me hearts. If you don't like me, just don't talk to me. AIi dork: Hmk. funny..sometimes, she still seems jealous that brandon left her for me...sometimes, she just seems jealous to begin with. :] not tryna be conceited or anything, but get over it. kiss

[ here | <3 ] [ go | back ]